Blessings

Certain places you may call home, I call certain people my home.

Doesn't the phrase go:

Home is where the heart is

?
Well my heart lies with certain people that uplift me just by asking me what's up. Only those people can say the same words to me as the rest and make them have a new meaning. Those people are my blessings.

The make me smile when I hear them speak.

They make me laugh despite my hard day.

They challenge my thinking without making me feel threatened.

They make the world a little brighter around me, and the day easier to get through.

They make me wonder what it is in them that makes them so easy to know, and why I wasn't blessed with their gift of uplifting.

But I know for sure I am blessed, just by remembering their faces and their smiles.

My blessing's names are Brian Morris, Kelsey Dillon, Adam Mauldin, and Mary Gay Jordan.

May you find your blessings in this world of trouble and confusion.

Singing

You want to know somthing that's slightly unusual? (At least I don't think this is how other houses work) Our house usually has some kind of music on. This includes anyone who decides to sing at that moment. So usually there is a spontaneous burst of song in our house (mostly compliments of Deanna) or we have a radio on or somthing to that effect.

This, I don't believe, happens in all houses. In fact, I have yet to hear someone randomly start singing in ANY house but ours.

Of course, I do enjoy this, as it is the sounds of home, but sometimes I wonder that if someone was watching our house whether they would get weirded out or not.

On another note, I've found only a handful of people who can change my attitude (positively) for a good few hours just by talking to them for a few minutes. Those are the people I simply love to death. They are, as I frequently say, my favorites :)

This morning I was pretty good in the attitude arena, and continued to be so until one of said favorites had a very small conversation with me, and my day was suddenly all the better. There is no comprehensible reason for this sudden burst of happiness, as it was a common exchange we have. Maybe it's because I can trust on having that exchange, and that makes it all the better. Who knows? Probably God, but I don't think He'll tell me. He seems to enjoy watching me learn from asking myself questions. Anyways, if you have a friend who's a favorite, you're very lucky, as those seem to be very few and far between.

Who am I even talking to? My sis gnat (ha I know you hate that name, but it's a habit now) I know is reading this, but who else would read my rambling ons? It's just a ramble of info that isn't nearly as interesting as Brian's infinite facts (see thisbipedsview.blogspot.com), and just continues to just take up time.

That was my original intention with this blog, just for it to take up time. If you've read my first one, you'll see that I was taking care of a friend's house when I started this, and now I'm continuing it because I helped my sis make her own today, and I decided to add on to my own.

Anywho, I've updated the look and now it's green instead of blue. whoopee.

Oh, speaking of colors, I STILL have yet to decide what to paint my room in the future! The bonus room needs to have paint soon, as the construction is done, and I believe the next step after cleaning is painting....and I don't know what to paint it. I want to use green and blue as my main colors, but for red, white and brown to be accent colors. I have a bathroom and bedroom to paint, and I don't know what color to use for either. The rooms aren't huge, so I have to use light colors, but so far all the colors I've seen are too yellow or too dark.

Anywho, I'd better go do something else,
Later!

College

College... a word that means change.

For some, it means a chance to get out of the environment they've just about had enough with, and can't wait to leave.

For others, its a chance that scares them to death and they don't want to take.

For me, it means a mixture of things. For one, I like to move on. I like to find new things and explore possibilities. Getting away from the life I feel is monotonous won't hurt either. On the other hand, I'm not necessarily one who embraces surprises. And this upcoming year of college is not necessarily territory I've explored before.

So, in one way, I'm looking forward to some change in my life. In another way, I wish the change was something I knew I could deal with, like moving to another state. That I've done enough to know what to do. For this upcoming year, I'm afraid of floundering so hard I hurt myself. And that's most likely to happen.

Off of that deeply creepy (and upcoming) subject, I have received 427 college emails. Yes, I saved them all and they are sitting in their own folder where I can wonder at the silliness of it all. I also find it so funny how those mailers you get about a college saying how much you would fit into this college, how accomplished you are, blah blah blah...they are sent by the masses. I used to work for a business that sent out mailers like that. I had the job of pasting someone's name into certain spots, and adding the date I they were finished. Wow, very personal.

Anywho, now that I've gotten that out of my system, I'm going to go check on random things that have no deep meaning.

Later!

Inferior?

I have this....feeling/compulsion that things that I do are inferior to other people's work.

The frustrating part is that I don't know why I feel inferior. It's not like people tell me that I am, or that my work's ever even been compared to someone else's work.

I usually don't have a problem with things unless:

a) I can't do a thing about changing it and I'm expected to
b) It really is my problem

As I sit here writing all of this, I still am comparing this to someone else's writing, as if I have to compete with them to make something worth reading.

My logic is that if it's public, it needs to be worth whoever's time it is I am taking up. But I'm not taking up anyone's time if no one's reading my blog, which means there's no reason for it to be public. Why I allow it to be public yet I'm wondering if it's worth anyone's time I don't know.

And then I go onto, is this even logic that I'm writing down, or is it just a mess of thought? Why do I even continue with this thought? Why don't I find something more exciting to write about, oh wait, I have nothing exciting in my life, but that adjective (like all adjectives) is a comparative. It doesn't exist unless I have something to compare it to. What is exciting then is my next question, and what is not exciting that I consider myself to be?

Ok, I've partially even confused myself. I think I mean to say that all of this is more than adjectives. Or maybe I mean adjectives are all they are. Hmm...what do I mean?

And there I go again, rambling on about something that I can't even keep up with. Which, in essence, makes me think I'm inferior.

How many languages can you say "yuck"?

I could ramble on, but I don't think this blog post would end, and then i'd fall even more behind in school. wonderful.

Over and out.

Time Change/ Sleep

I love the time change.

For the longest time I've felt like my body wanted more sleep than I could possibly allow it to have, as every day I have to get up for some reason or another before I wish to.

This time change, however, has made it to where I get an "extra" hour of sleep every night.

This is going to be a short ramble today, because I don't have all that much to continue on about.

Recently I've been watching TV before I go to bed, which is a brand new thing for me. Usually I don't watch TV at all, and only sometimes watch a movie before bed. But now that I'm over here at this house that is not mine all by myself, I have decided to pass the late hours watching shows that last 1/2 an hour to 1 hour total. My my we have short attention spans here.

Gotta get to school.