Enthusiasm

I don't know when the last time was that I was truly enthusiastic about something. Besides discussing a book. I really can't remember.

I've had a lot of: "oh that sounds like it should be exciting" moments, where I bring myself to have a passable enthusiasm.....but being enthusiastic about something on my own hasn't happened in quite a long time.

I'm just blah. Or depressed. Or maybe sometimes things will make me smile, and appreciate them. But not be enthusiastic.

I don't know if this is a part of my personality, or if it is a phase or season. I don't know.

The only form of "excitement" I may have is seeing people I've missed. Besides that, there really is nothing exciting out there for me.

I was excited for a bit about my idea for getting a masters in Early-childhood Development, which would couple with my Engineering Psych degree to help me develop software/ programs that would help kids learn at their critical stages.

Cause I prefer being with children over any age.

Everything is exciting for them. Their enthusiasm for something new is intoxicating. And I'm interesting by just being older than them. Which is pretty fun :)

I'm not cut out for a lot of things. I do my best, especially when it's my job. But my oomph is non-exsistent.

I don't know if I ever had it, or if I lost it along the way.

My friends get excited and involved and enthusiastic about so many things. And I'm just here.


One more time.

LP

TEXTBOOKS

I know I haven't written in quite a while, but i just had my first majorly-expensive textbook encounter and I'm still a bit stickershocked.

I'm hoping my parents can cover it, but IDK. To me $110 for a textbook ill be using for ONE CLASS seems excessive and overpriced, but to them they may think I'll be just fine.

I HATE SCHOOL.

STILL.

Yay ranting in public. I'm just so much fun aren't I?